The last time I spoke to my dad was about ten days ago. He was getting better from his illness (he suffered from idiopathic pulmonary fibrosis, a disease that slowly deteriorates the lungs with no chance of recovery), enough for the hospital to consider sending him home. But, as it turns out, I was the last person to talk to him. Ever.
We talked about many things. Family, friends, grad school, the Higgs boson…
But I can’t help but think that I never said that I loved him, very much, enough times. I am sure he knew that, but this feeling never goes away.
Of all the people who were part of my life until now, he was the one person who was responsible for me being who I am today. He was the one person I looked up to the most.
With him I learned the facts of life. That life is much more than the endless pursuit of money or knowledge or love or anything. That life must be lived to the fullest. And that one only accomplishes that by taking the most out of every moment. “Carpe diem” was his message.
Most of all, the one thing I am going to miss most is the unshakable faith he had in me. For every moment in my whole life, good or bad, he was always there. He was always the first one to support me, regardless of the situation. I always knew I could count on him. And, whenever the outlook on things seemed dark, he would say: “don’t worry, be happy”. And, like magic, all problems suddenly became no more than a footnote.
He was human, though. And, as such, he made a lot of mistakes. To me the really important thing is that, no matter what, he always aimed for the best and never gave up.
From now on, whenever I have difficulties in life, I won’t worry. I’ll be happy, because the memory of my father will remain with me. And I will remember that I’m human, and that most certainly I will make a lot of mistakes. But I will always aim for the best, and I will never give up.
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